When I was home in Cincinnati over Thanksgiving week, I found myself hanging out with some kids best described as Hippies (plus one agoraphobic Christian youth minister). They were delightful, and gracious, so I kept my snark inside when a few of them launched into a minor spiel against Starbucks. I actually found the spiel kind of delightful, too, since it’d been so long since I’d last heard any serious leftist anti-Starbucks sentiment. Made me a bit nostalgic.

I put it out of mind until I read Wendy Sullivan’s latest post on LadyBlog today, which was devoted entirely to right-wing anti-Starbucks sentiment. Something about how Starbucks serves up white liberal guilt along with it’s brew, and she’s not gonna take it (who says free add-ons are the way to drive sales in this economy?)

Starbucks: foe of hippies and cultural conservatives alike! Which, come to think of it, seems like a pretty decent business plan to me.

As I’ve said before (and, apparently, I’m going to say again), Starbucks has always seemed entirely utilitarian to me. It’s comfortable, but not charming. If you live in the city, there’s one on every corner, so it’s often the easiest option. It’s quick (usually), and you know there’s not much variance from one locale to the next (a fact which some people,I guess, see as a flaw, but I find comforting). This is all by way of saying I find anti-starbucks sentiment utterly baffling, in the most amusing way possible.

But what do I know? Clearly, I am too deluded by the soul-crushing patriarchal Big Coffee agenda and my white liberal mochaccino guilt to think clearly on these matters.

[P.S. Contrary to what this picture may have you believe, while I may be a tool of the coffeearchy, I do not usually look elfin.]